Memorable moments on the trail. #3 Loboche

It was our 7th day out and we had about a 5 hour hike. After lunch we climbed our first pass. It looked rather daunting from the bottom but we took it nice and slow, like always, and after a little more than an hour we were at the top. At the top was a memorial for all those who lost their lives climbing Everest. Most of the memorials were simple stacks of stones but there were a few larger ones with plaques and all. It was a neat place to see especially after climbing that pass. We rested here for a little while then continued on to Loboche. We had no idea what would be in store for us there.

At first we didn't take much notice of our guest house. Once we got to our room though, we saw that this was the worst one yet. It was so small that the beds didn't really fit. They were curled up at the ends. Also it looked like it was constructed entirely out of scrap materials. There was a dirty tarp on half of the ceiling, one wall was corrugated steel siding that had small holes in it from its prior use, and the rest, well let's just say it looked like we were in a run down shack. I'm sure the accommodations in tent city in Athens are comparable if not better. Tala had said her head was hurting, a sign of altitude sickness, and Shiba told her to eat some garlic soup. He also told us we should not take a nap this afternoon, but stay up and just hang out in the dining room. We did as he said and sat and talked amongst the many international trekkers. After some time, a group Russians came and sat at the open spots around us. They were all splitting a large pot of tea, nothing out of the ordinary up here. However, soon they started dipping their spoons in the jelly/jam jars on the table. Now this weirded me out for a couple of reasons. One, they were double, triple, quadruple, etc dipping and two, I thought of the unlucky people who would probably use that jam later and unknowingly eat some of those Russian's spit. They evidently didn't see anything wrong with their actions but I noticed some other trekkers watching them with a little disgust as well as some of the guest house employees. They must have eaten the better part of 2 jars before they were done with their tea.

The next slightly alarming event occurred shortly after the Russian tea party. Two young kids who worked at the guest house were charged with lighting a fire in the stove in the dining room to warm things up for the night. This was the first time I saw the dried yak shit being used for fuel. We had seen patties drying since day one, but we hadn't seen them used. In order to get the fire started, the boy added some kerosene and he also spilled some all over the stove. Next the two of them raced to get it all started with some matches. Tala felt very uneasy about this since our guest house was more or less a tinder box. The children got the fire started safely but we soon found out that the stove pipe did not work properly. Within a few minutes smoke from the burning shit was filling the dining room. Let me tell you this is not a pleasant odor. Tala and I decided to give up our seats and escape outside. It was quite cold but the fresh air was worth it. We then decided to check out a couple other guest houses nearby to see if there were any vacancies. Of course they both looked like 5 stars compared to our ramshackle dump and of course they were all booked up. Disappointed we returned to our room hoping to find refuge from the smoke. No luck, but it was better than the dining room where everyone had a bandanna or something of the sort covering their nose and mouth. In the room, Tala and I devised an escape plan should the place catch fire. Lucky for us we had a window to escape from unlike the rooms across the hall.

By dinner time, I was feeling ill. Part of it was due to the altitude but it was mostly due to our accommodations. For the first time I had trouble eating my dinner and I went to be early that night. I fell asleep easier than I thought but I woke up hearing the guy across the hall hacking and puking in his room. The walls were so thin I could've sworn he was right outside our door if not in our room. I expected to see vomit in the hall the next day but thankfully I didn't. Also in the night our room got smokey again which made getting back to sleep difficult. I found that I couldn't turn towards the wall next to my bed because the smell of gas/kerosene was too strong. We found out later that they put petrol in the water in the bathroom so it doesn't freeze. I won't even get into how disgusting that toilet was. Let's just say I decided to pee outside. Needless to say we survived our time in Loboche. I have never been so happy to get up at dawn to start hiking in the freezing cold as when we left that next morning. Thankfully we didn't have to stay there again on our way down.

Memorable moments on the trail. #2 Horse's milk

Our dinner in Deboche was also a new experience. Our guest house was particularly full and the dining room was rather small so our guide, Shiba, invited us to eat in the kitchen with the other guides and porters. It was kind of a back stage pass to see how the kitchen works in these guest houses and eat with the crew. A few of the guys were sitting near one of the stoves which are all wood fired and the rest were sitting at a couple of tables waiting for their dal bhat. They eat this stuff twice a day, every day. And like everything else on the menu, it's all made fresh to order. We came to find out that dal bhat is basically Nepal's national dish and most everyone eats it for breakfast and dinner. All it really consists of is rice (bhat) and a thin lentil soup (dal). There are also curried vegetables that can be prepared in several ways that accompany the rest.

Soon our food was served to us which was probably something like veg fried noodles and we could feel them watching us eat. It didn't matter much to me because I was hungry. When I was about finished one of the guides came in the kitchen with a red plastic pitcher and poured a couple of guys, including our guide Shiba, glasses of a milky white liquid. I was wondering if in fact it was milk and what kind it might be. I thought it would be yak milk. But before I could ask Shiba, he offered Tala and I a glass. He said, "It's horse's milk." I couldn't believe it. The first thing that came to mind was Jackass 2 when they helped 'milk' a stallion and one guy drank some. Gross. Then I wondered if it was even possible to milk female horses. For some reason that seems like it would be a funny sight to see. Well Tala quickly declined the offer and Shiba started laughing. He told us that it wasn't horse milk but chhaang, homemade rice beer. Upon learning this, I took him up on the offer of a glass. They drink it warm and it kind of tasted like sour sake. I didn't think it was bad at all and had a second glass. Apparently many household make the chhaang and all are a little different.

A few nights later I shared some chhaang with Shiba again. This time it was super chunky. It was really weird and a little difficult to drink. The taste was about the same but you couldn't take a sip because of the big chunks of rice. I had to pour it in my mouth, chew a little, and swallow. It really was like drinking your dinner. A couple of days before the end of our trek, Shiba, Tala, and I shared a couple of pitchers of chhaang and watched TV for the first time in almost 2 weeks. This time the brew was sweeter and without chunks. Very nice tasting and we all got a good mellow buzz. We watched about 2 hours of pro wrestling that evening and I found out that it's very popular with the guys working on the trail. Who knew?

Memorable moments on the trail. #1 Squat toilets

Reader advisory: Don't read if you don't want to know about my crap.

I never appreciated our 'western' style toilets more until the first time I was forced to take a crap hovering over a squat toilet. For those of you who haven't had the experience of using one, it's basically a toilet bowl sunk even with the floor. And most of the time, at the guest houses, you don't flush these things. Oh no, there's just a barrel of water with a small pitcher or something of the sort in it to scoop water out of it and dump it down the drain. Because of this, the floor in the bathroom is almost always completely wet and sometimes there's puddles.

It was day 4 and we were in Deboche. The last 'normal' toilet was in Namche, we had hiked for about 7 hours, and I had to go real bad. We got to our guest house and I checked out the bathroom only to see the dreaded squat toilet. I had to use it so I locked the door and popped a squat. It was so awkward and uncomfortable. I was trying aim correctly, make sure my pants wouldn't hit the wet floor, keep my balance, and still relax enough to do the deed. Very quickly my thighs began to burn from squatting, but I was able to drop a nice turd. I was pleased to see my aim was true but the effort had been a little nerve wrecking and I didn't feel the satisfaction of a job well done.

Tala and I were resting before dinner when the gas pains started and they confirmed what I had thought when I finished the first time, I wasn't done yet. In order to make it a little easier I decided to change to shorts so there'd be less chance of getting my clothes wet. So once again I locked myself in, this time for round 2. I positioned myself and lowered my shorts. As I bent and squatted down, a massive fart exploded from my ass and before I could laugh I was rocked by another which fired two turds...way off their mark. I broke out laughing and I was sure someone was hearing all this and wondering what the hell was happening in the bathroom. I regained my composure and really felt a lot better. Now I had to figure out the best way to move my waste across the floor to the bowl. Thankfully there was a little toilet brush propped up in the corner. After dumping a couple of pitchers of water down the hole, I washed my hands and was off to tell Tala. Unfortunately for her I had to tell someone and she was the only one there. She did, however, give me a good tip on squatting stances which undoubtedly helped make my bathroom time a lot easier for the rest of the trek.